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Citizen Stanley Blumberg wants to know if Republicans will defend Israel.

Preacher Paul says that his Parishioners are just as dumb as the Rednecks that vote for Republicans, so why do the Blacks always vote for Democrats.

One life-long Red-Rep wants to know why he should expect Republicans currently running for office to be less arrogant and incompet One life-long Red-Rep wants to know why he should expect Republicans currently running for office to be less arrogant and incompetent than the Republican he voted for the last two elections.

Lisa Doo-Wop of XYZ News wants to know how Republicans think Pope Benedict can bridge the differences between Islam and the West.

Marilyn Airhair, weather girl on XYZ News' The Morning Show, wants to know what the Republican candidates plan to do about global warming.

Marilyn and Czarnoff get married by Father Feeley and Marilyn tells Sara she can’t wait to help her run the network – as soon as she gets back from her honeymoon.

Hillary Clinton goes on the Larry King Show to thank the inmate tiny for saving Bill, promising him a pardon in ’08 when she’s elected president. At the same time, Sara Succubus leads a full attack on the prison, saves the day, but finds a surprise waiting for her when the dust settles.

Dr. Samuel Czarnoff sneaks into one of the trucks taking the fake Breyer’s ice cream into the prison yard. When the inmates are eating the fake ice cream, Czarnoff leads the SWAT teams out of the other trucks and rushes to defend Marilyn Airhair.

The Police Commissioner hatches a plan to send in SWAT teams hidden behind boxes of falsely labeled containers of Breyer’s Tasmanian Caramel Ice Cream demanded by the inmates in an effort to spring the former president.

Marilyn Airhair goes back into the prison yard to help save Rod O’Steele. Once inside, she discovered Rod has been raped, Tony Robins is still in the men’s room with some inmates, and the inmate Tiny has saved Bill Clinton.

C.U.M.’s Bosley Prick wants to negotiate a raise for Marilyn Airhair, while Hillary Clinton calls Sara Succubus in the helicopter on her way to the riot to ask Sara to keel Bill away from Marilyn.

The police Commissioner negotiate with Inmate Leader while Preacher Paul and Bill Clinton get to know Marilyn Airhair and Marilyn gets traded for 100 X-boxes.

Senior Anchor Jeff Bogart shows footage sent from the prison before the riot of Clinton addressing inmates about secrets to restraining your sexual proclivities, while the evangelist Preacher Paul excites inmates with passages from his book, “Hip Hop Your Way to Heaven.”

The police Commissioner negotiates to release Marilyn Airhair, Rod O’Steele and Bill Clinton, but inmates decide to **** Rod and Marilyn.

XYZ News Senior Anchor Jeff Bogart interviews Rod O’Steele and Marilyn Airhair and watches as they get taken hostage while Sara Succubus suits up to go to the Bronx and save the day.

News breaks that Bill Clinton was taken hostage at the prison in the Bronx.

Sara Succubus has second thoughts about sending Marilyn Airhair to what is looking like it’s going to be a big story in the Bronx.

Sara Succubus interviews the Warden by phone, but the line goes dead, as Marilyn Airhair and Rod O’Steele report live from the Bronx.

Sara Succubus is interviewing John Lithgow about his new Christmas book for kids when there’s breaking news about a prison riot in the Bronx.

Billy-Boy Fricasee and Dr. Czarnoff talk abut Marilyn Airhair’s future.

Sara talks to her cat, Emmy, about the raise she’ll be getting tomorrow on Christmas Eve.

Marilyn Airhair meets Dr. Czarnoff in front of the XYZ Tower and makes a strong impression.

Bosley Prick meets with Dr. Czarnoff about staff changes at XYZ News.

Marilyn Airhair thanks Sara Succubus, but confides her innermost fears to Billy-boy Fricasee.

Freddie and Makeup-Man hatch a plan to get Marilyn Airhair yanked off the air while Sara Succubus meets with Dr. Czarnoff.

Billy-Boy Fricasee and Dr. Czarnoff plot strategy for Sara’s raise.

Sara Succubus interviews the chairman of Tampax about his purchase of the naming rights to Tampa Bay Stadium.

Our Republican bigwig explains to his Democratic friend why Republicans win in the so-called “flyover states.”

Our wealthy businessmen discuss the ethnic variety present this election cycle.

Sara interviews Abdul Raja Feema Do-dah, who helps arrange for kid suicide bombers.

Electra is battling to keep her drag restaurant / nightclub out of the hands of his greedy landlord when, just a couple of weeks before Christmas, twelve-year-old Mary Jones walks into the restaurant and announces she's looking for her father, Harry Jones. We soon find out, of course, that Electra is Harry Jones, who had left his wife in Seattle twelve and a half years ago and run away to South Beach. His ex-wife, Hester, never told him she was pregnant, but Mary found out about Harry, and ran away from home to begin her new life with the Dad she never knew. Hester, meanwhile, rushes to South Beach to bring Mary home, only to find out that her ex is a drag queen.

Sara finds out Katrina Kolic has been named Best Dressed Anchor.

Rod O’Steele chats with correspondent Shady Messiwestiness about the White House Christmas Tree.

Hillary sees her shrink, Dr. Angelica Flutterberg.

Sara meets with network boss Dr. Samuel Czarnoff about her raise.

Sara plots with Freddie and Make-up Man to dethrone Marilyn Airhair.

Hillary's poodle, top Dog, gets groomed.

Gay half-breed Semihole Indian activist serial killer Juan-Juan Little-cock is apprehended in Weepin’ Manors, Florida.

Freddie meets Hercule Soiree and Sara finds out that ONN (the Other News Network) has given rival anchor Katrina Kolic a raise to $18 million a year.

Sara Succubus has a secret meeting with C.U.M. agent Bosley Prick and Millard Willmore.

Marilyn Airhair visits Sara Succubus and tries to “bond.”

Hillary thinks best in the shower.

Luattitude Buttress, Hillary's lesbian campaign manager, on the sensitive issue.

Luattitude Buttress, Hillary's lesbian campaign manager, on the sensitive issue.

Two fund-raisers compare notes.

Hillary finds out she's a Scorpio.

Sneaking crumbs for breakfast in the Green Room, Zza Zza the Rat overhears gossip that XYZ’s new weather girl, Marilyn Airhair, is giving producer Billy-Boy Fricasee a lot more than regular weather updates.

XYZ News' top-rated anchor on "The Morning Show," Sara Succubus, goes through her usual morning routine before going on the air.

Sara Succubus interviews Hoss and Mabel Pickens who’ve lost 3 sons in the Iraq War.

Father Feeley and Stanley Fink square off over JLAPS (Jewish Lawyers Against Priests)