ELFIS just received word from his sources monitoring the North Pole NAN channels (Naughty and Nice channels). A prominent young man named Tiger has been found singing this song as a result of improper control of his putter.
ELFIS, Short for "E Long Fong I Song", the name given to Santa Tech dropout "Stewart E Pedd II" by his Elf Guru, "Elfi Ona Honda Beyonda Ponda". Re-live the real life Stu Pedd adventures in word and song as ELFIS shares his twisted journey from normal North Pole kid to Santa Technical College to elf commune.
LYRICS:
Oh my wife finding out is frightful,
But hoochie blondes are just too delightful,
A rich young man has needs too, you know,
So I Text a Ho! Text a Ho! Text a Ho!
I'm addicted with no signs of stopping,
And there's porn stars that still need popping,
So when the lights are turned way down low,
I Text a Ho! Text a Ho! Text a Ho!
Whomever I finally kiss goodnight
How I hate not having them in my phone
Cause since I learned to T9 right,
All the way home I moan.
